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  • Sam Avery

I Thought I'd Seen It All


So I’m doing a gig, trying out new stuff for next year’s show.


I spot a girl filming me on her phone.


I politely ask her not to film as the bit I’m doing is brand new and I’m still figuring out how to make it work. She carries on filming so I very nicely ask again to please stop filming.


She says it’s to send to her friend. He’s from Liverpool, you see. Like me.


I ask her if he lives abroad. (Maybe he gets homesick and yearns to hear a Scouse accent?)


She says he lives in Liverpool so I gently question the point of sending a video of someone with a Scouse accent to someone who is surrounded by Scouse accents.


She finally stops filming. It’s all very amicable.


I start the next bit, again, new material that I’ve never said before.


I hear someone talking in the crowd.


I ask who it is.



Nobody answers.


I recognise the voice.


It’s ME.


What?


For some reason she’s now playing the video back to herself and my own voice from 2 mins ago is now disrupting the gig.


That’s right. I’m heckling myself.


And I thought I’d seen it all...

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