I Thought I'd Seen It All
So I’m doing a gig, trying out new stuff for next year’s show.
I spot a girl filming me on her phone.
I politely ask her not to film as the bit I’m doing is brand new and I’m still figuring out how to make it work. She carries on filming so I very nicely ask again to please stop filming.
She says it’s to send to her friend. He’s from Liverpool, you see. Like me.
I ask her if he lives abroad. (Maybe he gets homesick and yearns to hear a Scouse accent?)
She says he lives in Liverpool so I gently question the point of sending a video of someone with a Scouse accent to someone who is surrounded by Scouse accents.
She finally stops filming. It’s all very amicable.
I start the next bit, again, new material that I’ve never said before.
I hear someone talking in the crowd.
I ask who it is.
I recognise the voice.
For some reason she’s now playing the video back to herself and my own voice from 2 mins ago is now disrupting the gig.
That’s right. I’m heckling myself.
And I thought I’d seen it all...